Stop, Drop and Roll

Often times in life you find yourself in awkward uncomfortable situations. One of my least favorite is the walking in on a couple fighting moment. For me this is an every day situation with my neighbors. It is a knock down drag out fight everyday. Then loud phone conversations about affairs. What to do in this situation?

1. Never leave your house again. Your house is warm and safe. And hey you can even get groceries delivered now.

2. Pretend to be on your phone as you walk to and from your car. This gives you the appearance of not hearing anything that is going on.

3. Send flowers with a love you note attached. And just sit and wait for the fireworks to ensure. That will be a good show. Don’t forget to have popcorn ready.

4. Sell your house, join the peace corps, and give up shaving. Drastic times call for drastic measures.

5. Hide behind the curtain and take notes on what not to do in a marriage. Someone might as well learn something from this situation. Then sell your ideas and go on Oprah.



21 thoughts on “Stop, Drop and Roll

  1. Live in NYC. I’ve heard the couples on both sides of me have some horrible, knock down drag out flights. Heard one this morning, in fact. THe couple that was fighting was a nice yuppie couple, though I was shocked by what was coming out of their mouths. Believe me, it’s not something you want to hear.

  2. We used to share a wall (1940s row home) with a younger couple who were friendly, but fairly reserved — UNTIL they started fighting behind closed doors. The most painful/awkward evening was the night she made HIM cry. We felt so uncomfortable the next time we saw him — having just listened to him cry like a baby the evening before!

  3. I used to be that couple, unfortunately…probably one of the reasons I’m no longer married…the only person on the PLANET who could drive me to scream like a crazy person was my ex-husband…unfortunately, I never did think about how it felt to be the person who could hear us…I wish I could find my old neighbors and apologize profusely! On behalf of yours, we’re sorry…VERY sorry…and I vote for #5…lol

    • I was also in a relationship like that. I used to wonder why no one ever said anything to us. I secretly wished someone would have stepped and said something to help get me from that terrible place.

  4. I was in a bottom corner apartment when my older two were babies. The people above me two couples and then the lady and her grown son beside me. They use to all hang out do their drugs and then go home and fight like cats and dogs. I never said anything about the party and things in the halls above me. I couldn’t hear it in my house my kids couldn’t see it. But when they really started knocking each other around and you could hear dressers and tables and things being broken it woke my kids up I would call the police. One night I listen to the one next two me all night and up into the morning. I was so mad about 4 or 5am. I went and ripped my door open and she was in the hall right there and I let her have it. I don’t know what all I said but she was running in her place and locking the door. It made me so mad because everyone else was afraid of them all and wouldn’t say anything. So when I would say something to the owner it looked like I was complaining about nothing because no one else would say anything. Needless to say we didn’t stay there long.

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