Somehow I have acquired over 2500 blog followers. Yet, I cannot seem to get over 100 twitter followers.
So I have decided I suck at tweeting. I know this to be completely true.
Here are some examples of my lame tweets that you are all missing out on:
1.There is a huge difference between a good apple and a shitty apple. I’m just saying.
2. Let’s be friends but never hang out. So strangers. Let’s be strangers.
3. I won’t say back pack Dora. You can’t make me.
4. Anyone up for a quick run? And by quick run I mean mimosa. We drink at dawn in Louisiana.
5. So little time so much to do. Good thing I’m magic.
6. Damn it Dora. No means no. I won’t say map either. Even if he comes with cool jazzy music.
7. The wife is cleaning up after me because that is what wives are for.
8. Sending prayers to the dryer gods Wait… There aren’t multiple gods controlling my laundry. Damn that was excuse for my clothes.
9. Camera- child one breaks into tomorrow from Annie with Jazz hands . Camera- child two death stare and goes still
Clearly I need more than 140 characters to write anything of any significance.