I meant to say that

I find that in life I often find myself in awkward situations. Depending on how unprepared I am, finding a comeback is often difficult. I absolutely hate when after everyone has left I finally come up with the perfect response. Then I find myself practicing what I should have said over and over in my mind. Even though I know darn well the likelihood of a similar situation coming up and me being able to use the clever phrase will never happen.

So I have decided to leave a few of my best “things to say in awkward moments”

1. The nurse asking you when you last had sex in front of your dad moment

-start crying

2. Your student telling you that you look way too innocent to be pregnant moment

– Smile, ignore, and pretend it never happened

3. The someone says something crazy political thinking you agree moment

-Doesn’t that just show how amazing it is that God loves everyone?

4. The something is so stupid it takes your breath away moment

– you know I never thought of it that way

5. The someone says something hurtful moment

-I know you may not have meant that to be disrespectful, but I would appreciate it if you would not talk to me in that manner.

Always remember a poker face is key in all responses. One must fully commit and never look back.

– yes these have all happened to me-

*image from photo bucket*