Are your words magical?

The best thing about old ladies it their ability to exaggerate.  They should really be spending their time writing best selling fiction.

Story 1:

My neighbors, two sweet old ladies, in the two houses next me watch out for me. Since I was out of town this weekend they promised to watch the house. So, sunday morning they were patrolling my backyard. I guess backyards are where the bad guys sneak around. And found a big puddle of water next to my hose.

Can you see the monsoon?

As you can see from the photo the puddle was so large it must be a burst pipe. They are ready to cut the water off to my house because the whole house may flood. Do they call me? No, because I am out of town, they call my father. He calls me because he is out of town. I call my friend Sarah who rushes over to find this tiny puddle.

Story 2:

I was at my friend’s daughters’ birthday. Balloons, cupcakes, hamburgers, and traumatic swim lesson stories. I sat down at the wrong table only to get caught in a story about teaching young children to swim. Sounded like a good story so I started listening. Then it all went down hill. The teacher forces the kids under water and they start to scream and cry. Then she distracts them with toys, so she can force them under again. All I can say is interesting in hopes that I don’t start to scream in horror and run away. Of course I run to my friend and ask what really happens. The actual lesson involves the kids jumping in the pool and letting their head go under water with no screaming.

Now if I could only learn to tell stories like some of the women in my life. They know exactly just what to say to get your heart pumping and you jumping up to solve the problem. It is as though their words compel you in ways that other peoples words cannot. What is this magical power and how do I get it?

yeah that just happened

 

Time for my super important Sunday advice:

1. Be careful what you title your blog. I have a blog titled Old Ladies gone wild. In which I discuss being very outspoken as I get older.  At least once a week I get a hit from someone searching old ladies doing it on google. Dead serious. I guess you could say hey someone is reading your blog, but do I really one someone who is watching old ladies doing it porn reading my blog. Not really.

2. Be careful what you say to teenage boys. I once said that is what she said to a 14 year old not even thinking about what it really means. OMG they could not stop laughing. I had to be like thats not what I meant, but it didn’t matter at that point. too late.

 

What sunday advice do you have ?