Oh the places we go…

My friends I know I have been gone far too long. Here are my very justifiable excuses:

1. Grad School Thesis- two weeks left fingers crossed

2. Family Vacation- went to the beach so be jealous

3. Took on a second job- I got 99 problems and bills are one.

 

Here is the epic beach trip we took for my daughters 3rd birthday. What? I have a three year old, but I look so young? I know I know its a curse 🙂

 

First we get into the car. Because obviously the government is still holding its transporter secret. Damn government. The first that happens is I see corn fields. When I used to see corn fields I would think children of the corn. Every damn time. Now I think “Is that GMO corn.” Dear god, I have gone over to the green side y’all. There is no hope for me. Save yourselves.

This corn will kill you! Watch out!!

This corn will kill you! Watch out!!

Now I realize I was in alabama, but apparently they need to let you know that if you are hungry you should eat.

I'm hungry, but not for your nasty food.

I’m hungry, but not for your nasty food.

You probably can’t see it but it says hungry in giant letters I promise. Then, I think well once I get to the beach I will safe from this food that is obviously trying to get me. And then this happens.

Did the SUV make it? I will never know.

Did the SUV make it? I will never know.

Sure, I could have been a good person and tried to help them from their inevitable demise by shark attack, but who are we kidding I am pro- choice, so we all know I don’t care about human life.

To come full circle on my satanic beach trip we all settled into the condo to play a little magic. Because nothing like casting spells and fighting the underworld to make you feel better about life.

Can you feel the evilness.

Can you feel the evilness?