You know what is wrong with America today?
Education.
Yes as a teacher I believe this wholeheartedly.
How did I come to this conclusion. Obviously the door to door religious salesmen in my neighborhood.
knock, knock … who is it? … It’s the Jesus people ma’am we are here to save you from the perils of the universe with only 3 easy payments
Every saturday a church group ( I am not going to say which church you can guess if you want) goes door to door in big groups throughout the neighborhood telling tales of how we are in the end times.
I decided that I had spoken with them enough times and put up a very classy silver no soliciting sign.
see the handprint- that is the ghost’s handprint. I am not lying.
Now, one would think that this wonderful sign would strongly let solicitors know I am warning them to stay off my property.
One problem, they do not know what soliciting means. Dead serious.
Education Fail.
I have taken to barely opening the door, yelling no soliciting and slamming it shut. Has proven to be quite effective.
nevercontrary 
Ok, I live in the South, too, and I have to say that I am VERY thankful the roving religious people have not wandered through my neighborhood! I do get the occasional stranger at my door. Usually the two screaming children is enough to scare them away, though…
They hit up every house on my block. They split into four groups. It is wild.
That ghost hand print is scary.
It is huge too. Way bigger than anyone in the house. And the location on the curtain like that makes no sense.
ok. Im inspired. I wasnt gonna tell my true to life ghost story but…i havent posted for a while and i think its time for our family secret to come out.
Do it!
I really want to see these people freaked out by your ghost. Please lure them back for that purpose. Don’t forget to video tape and then post it.
That would be some good tv.
How about setting up hidden little speakers with ghost noises playing…or a Beware Of Dog sign – I’m sorta in the South and I know that everyone can read that sign..
My neighborhood has a good number of pitbulls that roam, so I do not think anyone walking around my streets is afraid of dogs.
Hmmm..oh well. it was a thought…;-)
When I was little my dad was sitting on the step when the religious rovers approached. He told them to “wait a moment” then he came out of the garage and squirted them with the hose. Oh, yes he did…
That is awesome. Best dad moment ever.
Hear, they claim they are not soliciting because they don’t ask for any money and they aren’t selling anything. I’m going to get me a ghost.
I imagine they have the same logic here as well. Thinking of getting a big sawed off shot gun that way I can just click it from behind the door.
Perhaps you could mention that you have a scary dog that eats solicitors? I bet they’d understand the meaning of soliciting then!
Perhaps, but if they do not know they are a solicitor they may not think the dog would eat them.
What an inspiring commitment to education you have….teaching those poor fools a new word! Good for you!
Education one person at a time.
I had to laugh at “three easy payments for you to be saved.”
Be careful to read the fine print. It usually says a lot more payments necessary to remain saved.
Haha! Technically, the religion-walkers (I like to call them) are not soliciting, they’re proselytizing. It’s why they – and the political types – don’t make the national do-not-call list no matter how many times you apply your phone numbers. But a nice “Home Sweet Hell” sign might do the trick.
We ignore them all equally. My non-religion suits me very much, thank you. I figure if God wants me, he knows where to find me without sending out scouts.
I did not know they qualified as something else. I saw a sign on pinterest that said, we found jesus, we love our vacuum, and we something else can’t remember it. Thought is was pretty cute.
I was glad I don’t have “religious rovers” pounding on my door, trying to sell me their religion, but then I read this 😦 You guys have some great ideas and I can’t really use them! I especially like the story about the man getting the hose and squirting him. Ah well, maybe one day I’ll get that chance. Until then, I might try it on my annoying neighbors.
Cute story, though! Keep at it. I’m sure they’ll leave eventually 🙂
Of course now that you have publicly admitted it, they heard it and will be arriving at your door shortly. be ready.
Sweet!
I am going to have to make myself one of those signs… Usually when I’m out walking in a shopping plaza minding my own business, there’s a group of four that always comes up to me even though it’s obvious I’m walking to the other side to get away from them…. I figured I could post the sign on my forehead or my back. LOL!
That would be awesome.
It takes a lot to get some people to go away especially when they are on a mission.
Speak to the truth lulu.